June 2, 2007

Went to see KNOCKED UP. Fun, if not quite as fun as THE FORTY YEAR OLD VIRGIN. Nice to see Seth Rogen both butt naked and with generous, long shots of the furry chest. :)

One is somehow tempted to reply to the movie poster's line about 'What if this guy got you pregnant?' with (a) it would be a medical miracle (b) I would be the happiest second daddy in the world and (c) late in the pregnancy, I would probably switch to blow jobs to keep Seth happy, even if pediatricians said it was safe to have 'normal' intercourse (oh, heck, I'd be administering them earlier too :) ).

and now a few ideas for direct-to-video sequels:


(1) The Boy Looked At Johnny - in which Whoopi Goldberg, having deciphered 'Jumping Jack Flash', now must figure out what Patti Smith is mumbling during 'Land' to solve another mystery

(2) The Seventh Sense - in which Haley Joel Osment discovers he can see dead careers.

(3) Shrek 4 - Shrek discovers he has become Prime Minister of Canada, which is odd, given that Pinocchio would be a much better choice (or, for that matter, the (necessarily reincarnated) King from the first movie)

(4) Brokerback Mountain - it was all a dream, a horrible, horrible dream...Jack and Ennis get together and move to Canada and get married. Within about a week, they realize that they had never actually been to Montana at all, and that Alberta is looking very, very familiar.

(5) Ooh, a Music Scuffle - Low, Sufjan Stevens and Prince shock us with their non drinking, vegetarian, Christian antics.

(6) Monsters Ltd - in which little Boo opens her closet and discovers that a former governor of New Jersey, a henchman to Joseph McCarthy and the son of Phyllis Schlafly have taken up residence there...aaaaagh!

(7) Fly II - in which an insect crawls all over the naked body of George W Bush. This is a horror film for all parties involved.

(8) The Omen 478 - in which we learn that the Antichrist cannot be killed until we...just...stop...WATCHING.

(9) The Brunch of the Living Dead - come on, even zombies deserve to sleep in ONE day of the week

(10)Austin Powers: Deadhorsey - well, the title speaks for itself...

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